Posts Tagged ‘The BOOB Show’

Happy TIFFing!

Monday, September 12th, 2011

Wow, too long since my last post – again! Things have been awesome and busy (or awesomely busy) here though… I was down in Atlanta for Dragoncon recently, and I had a blast meeting so many new people and selling off my “I <3 BOOBs" buttons for The BOOB Show. I went down with a LOT and came back with less than 10... so I was pretty happy about that. Speaking of the BOOB Show, it's going to be hosted solely on my own Youtube channel from here on in, and during TIFF I am re-releasing the episodes a few at a time. So, bounce on over to the playlist and watch your favourite episodes again. I am hoping to get my own Youtube partnership happening! There’s also going to be a few videos from Dragoncon, including a new BOOB Show episode as well as a fun dice living one… plus other goodies!

I also got to briefly chat with a few fine folk at Dragoncon – Wil Wheaton, Misha Collins, and of course the awesome Abney Park. Pee ess, the stills from Talio are up here, but here’s a teaser for now!

In other news, TIFF is happening in Toronto for the next few weeks. I had the pleasure of attending a couple of pre-parties last week, including the Dolby Surrounded panel at the Lightbox. I got to meet some great people there and at the Jetlagged party; it’s so exciting to see where current/future technology is taking us. For example, the work that goes into digitally remastering old classics… it’s incredible to see how they ease out every grain or hair or any tiny flaw in the older prints. The time they put in would blow your mind! Plus it was fun to see some Pixar trailers with new technology, including a more comprehensive surround sound setup. As an actor I think it’s SO important to recognize all the behind the scenes work that go in to making stellar end products and making those on screen look and sound their best.
This week, highlights for me include Festival Music House and VIP-ing it up at the Out There Hospitality Lounge. (I’ll be posting more detailed TIFF blogs later, so stay tuned for that!)

In project news, I was a on a MuchMusic PSA last week, and am headed back to London tomorrow for more Windchocombe. My mother called me the other day to say that my uncle had spotted me on TV on my episode of Instant Cash – I hear that’s getting a lot of airtime! I also just received word that Black Eve’s been finished… so that makes TWO films of mine that you can catch on the big screen in the near future.

Yes, two! The other film is Stiffs On The Green and it screens here in Toronto on October 8th. I would love to see you ALL out! It’s a very funny indie film, and the character I’m playing in it is so far removed from myself. I’m pretty stoked to see it and I hope you all will join me.

Last but not least… I have yet more blog posts coming for you guys this week. I am also taking part in Speak Out With Your Geek Out this week, so expect some shiny posts coming later about some of my various geeky passions.

That’s it for now!

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Posted in acting, busy girl is busy, dice living, Out and About | 1 Comment »

I Have Been Her Kind

Monday, July 25th, 2011

I should be crying, but I just can’t let it show.
I should be hoping, but I can’t stop thinking

Of all the things I should’ve said,
That I never said.
All the things we should’ve done,
That we never did.
All the things I should’ve given,
But I didn’t.

Oh, darling, make it go,
Make it go away.

Give me these moments back.
Give them back to me.
Give me that little kiss.
Give me your hand.
- Kate Bush: This Woman’s Work

I’ve been debating whether or not to publicly put in my two cents about Amy Winehouse’s death. Amanda Palmer’s blog has a brilliant post about it, something I relate quite to and I feel is written beautifully. Also, I applaud Kimya Dawson for being wonderfully raw and real about her own experiences with drugs and darkness.

But my story’s a little different than that. (Or maybe not, but everyone will admit to different things.)

I never knew the woman and didn’t idolize her music nearly as much as other musical influences, but in death Amy’s hit me in unspeakable ways. See, I have been her kind. I’ve never been so far and so badly gone that I’ve overdosed, but I know what it’s like to get lost to the point where you can’t see the people in front of you who care and want you to thrive. Personal hells are just that – personal. You can’t claim to understand thoughts that aren’t yours. Drugs and alcohol and sex are all good distractions from the noise in your head – insecurities and demons and losses – but they only go so far. They don’t erase, only numb, and there’s only so much you can do before the voices break through again.

I believe Amy sang because she wanted to share her message, her feelings, her grief. She sang waiting for someone to say “I understand, I’ve been there too. Now pick yourself up and come along. It’s going to be alright.” And maybe she sang to say the same thing to others.

Making art (whether you’re a singer, writer, filmmaker, actor, whatever) is about life and emotions and relating to other people. It’s about getting your unique message out there, about trying to make sense of what you know and feel and experience. And with that all, you’re offering your experiences to others on a silver platter. You want to be understood, accepted, loved. And all of that can drive you mad.

There are times when I’m afraid to feel, because (like the quote in my last blog post) I know how overwhelming it is. A lot of creative folk are like this, I find. Love wants to burst from your chest and makes you dance in the streets. Misery lurks around corners and attacks out of nowhere, savaging you like a bear. It’s hard to not get caught in that tumultuous undertow, the ebb and flow. Monroe, Cobain, Van Gogh, Ledger, Elliot Smith, a hundred thousand others have been there too and got lost.

No one person’s feelings are any more or less valid, less real, than anyone else’s. But they’re sure as hell going to vary in intensity and focus. Creative people especially are vulnerable to what I think of as neurodiversity or uniquely-brained: many struggle with some or another ‘mental illness’. It’s not something that people can just permanently think themselves out of and move on from, like those who have relatively ‘normal’ brains can. Moods haunt like ghosts.

As an actor, I sometimes wonder if I’m not a part of that group. Why it is so natural for me to suffer tragic deaths over and over in the horror films I’ve been in. Why I am so easily able to become a troubled victim of rape and incest. Why I can kill my own child. Why I can be an otherworldly creature. In these moments, I’m not pretending or denying the feelings that come. I just am. It scares people just how quickly I can cry on camera when needed, and how quickly I can laugh again when the cameras stop. In those moments, I feel it all, and it moves through me. Other times, without that immediate and wonderful creative outlet, it won’t let go.

It’s all or nothing. You either feel everything and take what comes with it, or you try to shut off. And shutting off ruins your art, makes it a hollow shell. I’ve had those bad auditions where I just couldn’t connect to the character and the bad improv sets where I know I’ve just been a talking head. And in those moments, you feel like you’ve failed yourself, and it all starts again.

Amy Winehouse, the girl who felt too much. Rest in peace with all the other creative souls.

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Posted in miscellaneous, PSAs, videos | 2 Comments »

Fear and Loathing

Saturday, February 5th, 2011

I am probably the furthest thing from a singer you could imagine, these days. Way the hell back when (you know, before my metaphorical testicles dropped and I was about half the height I am now) I used to be able to nail the aria from Phantom. These days, it’s mostly The Yeah Yeah Yeahs on Rock Band if anything.
I am not quite at the “skinning cats” screeching level, though I have two ‘ranges’ and a whole bunch of notes that go missing in between those two ranges. And when I’m sharp, I’m sharp, and I don’t mean in the witty comeback sort of way.

So nobody’s more surprised than me that I actually bothered with a music video for this week’s BOOB Show. Mostly, that I ponied up and actually sang and am actually putting this out to the world.
At least the lyrics are reasonably witty. And there’s a partially shirtless Frenchman in the video. ;p

Also, I probably shouldn’t open my mouth on this but now that it’s public news… yeah. The company that tried to sue me and caused me some serious strife, Frozen North Productions, is being shut down entirely. To some extent, I actually feel bad, because when I’m put in situations where I need to fight back my damage radius often extends to innocents, often without my intending it to, because I get pretty big and bad when I get my back up.

I will say that some people there didn’t deserve to lose their jobs, so for that I’m sorry to hear that news. Hopefully new opportunities will come their way soon… but for those who decided to harass and attack both me and my charity work, hopefully they learned a valuable lesson. I don’t tolerate fools well, but anyone who knows me knows that I give as good as I get. And it’s just a matter of “the greater the darkness, the greater the light”, so to speak. Yeah, I’m borrowing a quote from a video game. So sue me. ;p

But don’t really. I’d rather be working on scripts, or on prep for some of the projects I’ve got coming up soon. Which I will post about when I can, I promise.

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Posted in acting, miscellaneous | 1 Comment »

Ch-ch-changes…

Monday, January 31st, 2011

Dear everyone,
As you may or may not have heard, probably the single biggest change I have decided to make in my life is that I am going to be going vegan. For at least a few months, if not as a more permanent thing. There’s a lot of reasons for this, and it is going to be damn hard because I love my meat and cheese and ice cream and yogurt and other things that are unhealthy for me… but truth is, after gaining some weight for a project a bit ago, I just haven’t been able to shed it back in the same way as I had before, and my body has been ever-increasing in griping at me in regards to what I’ve been eating – even though it’s been healthy food. Mostly. I’ve been getting more sensitive to a lot of foods lately and my body has flat-out rejected (through violent internal means) a lot of these same foods. It kills me to give up things like my yogurt, but I’m gonna give this a go and see how I feel in a couple months, then re-evaluate.

So yeah, that’s big and scary but I’ve got a couple of lovely ladies who have been inspiring me, so that helps. One thing I wanted to touch on – and if you have not heard about it, go read online, as there are scads of articles about it – is Portia De Rossi’s comments on her anorexia. I am very proud of her – a lovely woman I grew up watching on Ally McBeal – for portraying anorexia in a realistic light. There’s such a fucking dichotomy in the industry when it comes to body weight and appearance. People are criticized often for being “too fat”, but in a lot of ways, “too thin” is still idealized, and that needs to come to an end. Yes, movements are being made to bar unhealthy-looking models, but then we have other celebs like Mila Kunis providing mixed messages about unhealthy weight. That she needs to “take time to be okay with more fat on her” … what the hell are you propagating, Hollywood?

Do me a favour, guys. Talk to your women friends, girlfriends, mothers, sisters, whomever – buy them a nice meal of their favourite foods and tell them how fabulous they look, no matter what size they are now. Extra five pounds? Bloody encourage it. REAL WOMEN are not meant to look airbrushed like porn stars or emaciated like twelve year old boys from Africa. Love the boobs, love the curves, love every goddamn inch of them. Because too many women think they’re fat/ugly/old/wrinkly/just plain not good enough. That needs to stop, and let’s face it, most women are secretly terribly insecure about weight and size, no matter how perfect others may think they are already.

Let’s change what the network bigwigs think we want to see in demographics. Let’s change the goddamn industry. Tell them curves are lovely. Look at what the Greeks found beautiful. Why can’t we have that now?

… I’ll end the rant here for now, but the soapbox stays.

Next up – this week’s BOOB Show.

… and a piece of spoken word I recorded. My first one. Eep!

Lastly, I’ve got something to confess. I may have said this before. I fall in love at least twice a day with things I find beautiful/inspiring/compelling – people, ideas, places, what have you. I want you to check out:

Miss Late July. She’s a talented musician and writer, and absolutely gorgeous. She blogs in a way I wish I could blog, and I am glad to be slowly getting to know her.

Katherine Curtis. This lady is made of awesome. She’s actually one of my inspirations for going vegan, and I fucking adore her. So there.

Liana K. My other big inspiration for healthier eating choices, and another strong woman I am proud to call a friend. She’s got more drive, intelligence, ambition, and talent in her pinky finger than some people will have in their entire lives.

Veronika Swartz. One of the most hilarious and straightforward ladies I know. Also gorgeous, smart, talented, versatile and creative as fuck. Who else would dress up as Lady Gaga and rock it so well?

Maybe I just have an affinity for other sassy redheads. Who knows. But seriously, I love these women and you should too.

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Posted in busy girl is busy, miscellaneous, videos | 3 Comments »

BOOBs and Fat Unhappy People

Monday, January 24th, 2011

Thoughts on this week’s episode?

In other news, first off I want to share this pretty fantastic blog post I found: from Chris Frampton, on Art and Fear. Ironically, it sums up a lot of my own thoughts as of late.

Tangentally related to that, I took a great workshop yesterday – Brian Levy’s Audition Technique workshop. Actors… take it. While there were some common-sense things presented (like good grooming before going to auditions), I also learned quite a bit that I had not previously known. And it was great to get a chance to see myself do some on-camera work as well. With The BOOB Show, a lot of what I do is fairly pre-planned and I get to use the best takes. Auditions are usually in and out, so actors don’t get that luxury.

It gave me a lot to think about, I will say that. Like why I get so goddamned nervous and start tripping all over myself at the worst possible times. Why I don’t always book the gig after an audition. How I shoot myself in the foot sometimes before even walking in the door. The quest for perfection is frustrating as hell.

I’m also thinking about what sort of art I want to be making, what I want to do with my life, all those good things. Big Damn Scary Thoughts, that.

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I Win.

Thursday, January 20th, 2011

So, as of today, Frozen North’s lawyer (Hicks Morley) has dropped the case and no longer represents them. Probably because it became very evident very quickly that they – not me – were the ones guilty of various things. To say the least. Funny how far people will take their lies and harassment, though.

How’s that for a slap in the face with a bag of dicks?

Now excuse me while I go eat a baby. I’m that ecstatic.

And here, have some BOOB Show!

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Announcing The BOOB Show! And… boobs.

Tuesday, January 4th, 2011

Happy 2011, everyone!

The good, part 1: despite any setbacks that came up, Futurecon was by and large a success. I will share final totals when I have them, but highlights included room parties running to 7 am, someone actually ponying up and paying $100 to sharpie me, some great conversations and brilliant friends, funnel cake (though I still did not get to eat any), 32 people in the 7 person hot tub, and a great group of people that I got to work with to pull this whole thing off. Anyone who was not there missed the BEST New Year’s party of the decade, hands down. I have never been as happy as I was… and now, we’re doing it again at the end of this year. ;)

The mildly amusing/annoying/’bad’: Frozen North now wants to “settle” – and by settle, they want me to sign papers saying that we won’t claim anything against each other and that they can just essentially sweep this whole thing under the rug.
I’m sorry, but I am not going to sign anything that essentially says it’s okay for them to have harassed me and gotten away with it, especially considering their blatant lies throughout this whole process. So yeah, I am filing my defense and counterclaim first thing tomorrow (want to know about lawsuits in the superior court? Ask me how!) and we’ll get on with the dog and pony show. Yes, it’s ridiculous, and yes it would be nice to not have to deal with it, but considering that they actively targeted not only me but a charity? I’m sorry, I’m not going to just roll over and take it. Some kind person has put together this blog here in my defense: Support Emily Schooley and while I am not certain of who it is, I am appreciative nonetheless that someone cares enough about the truth to keep a record of it. And yeah, it’s funny what goes on in the head of someone who is making a children’s game, essentially.

What I find wonderfully suspicious is that a friend of Julian’s, who I knew from my time in Windsor, messaged me rather out of the blue yesterday asking who put the site together and asking for her chat logs to be taken down, as she was involved in this as well. After I replied to her, my blog earlier today was “mysteriously” infected with malware (think it’s all clean now, sorry guys!)
You know, it sucks that other people are getting hurt by Julian’s idiocy and sexual depravity as well, but unfortunately, he tries to cover everything up with lies and threats rather than just owning up to his mistakes and shortcomings. I could have gone after Frozen North right when I was let go – for sexual and otherwise harassment, for wrongful termination – but I am not a petty, spiteful person. So I didn’t. Now, however, I think it is doubly important to fight back, as I am being punished, pursued, and harassed for not only defending myself against initial lies and harassment when they went on too long, but for fighting back against them as they escalate.

So yeah, you fuckers can bite me, long story short. I am not the bad guy here. I am not the office of 12 or so guys ganging up on one woman. I am not on the warpath, the offensive. I am not the one doing the harassing, directly or through ‘anonymous’ means. But I AM standing up to your empty scare tactics, and I will NEVER pretend this never happened, I will never give you the validation that you were right to harass me and then lie about it. I will never say it was alright for you, under the guise of an anonymous internet user, to target a charity event. I will carry this on as long as I need to, until Frozen North grows the hell up, admits to their mistakes and lies, and pays due reparations. Considering what they’ve put me through, I think it’s only fair. And like the title of my post, they are essentially being boobs. And not in the my awesome cleavage* sort of way.

The good, part two: 2011 is going to be a year of opportunities and changes for me, I have decided, and the first is that I am launching a webseries in conjunction with Wildsound called “The BOOB Show”. Check out the trailer for it here. First episode launches at the end of this week. I will be posting links all over when episodes come out – it may even be a weekly thing. I’m running with that whole ‘comedy’ thing like some people run marathons with scissors.

*It’s sort of an inside joke. And really has nothing to do with The BOOB Show.

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Posted in acting, miscellaneous, Out and About | 5 Comments »